Sunday, 6 April 2014

I'm alive!

So it's been a long time since I last posted, and the bygone months have been the most dramatic, jam-packed ones of my life, without a shadow of a doubt. I spent the majority of it in hospital and have since been diagnosed with gastroparesis and intestinal failure.

On 11th December, I was admitted again to the same hospital and the same ward by my gastroenterologist, and stayed there until the end of February when I finally came home as a HPN patient. I still can't believe that "this is me" and that this is nearly the end of the road in terms of what can be done for my quality of life. Looking back and thinking about the things I've lost over the last few months is really difficult and I am sad in more ways than one for the sacrifices I've had to make.

I was tried and tested with nasogastric and nasojejunal tubes, then had a jejunostomy/J-tube placed, which proceeded to be unsuccessful on the nutrition front. I dropped to 38kg, at which point TPN became a life-saving means of treatment and we had no choice but to have a Hickman line placed for this to be initiated. Since then, I have gained about 6kg and although my symptoms are plentiful and extreme at times, I am back at home and enjoying my privacy, peace and quiet.

Gastroparesis and intestinal failure have really torn my life up over the past few months and have forced me to defer my place at university until September. I learned how much I really do love food and how it is the centre of nearly all social gatherings and occasions. I have learnt much more in terms of life and giving back, but I won't go into that for now.

I'll slowly fill my blog in with what's happened over the next few weeks when I'm feeling up to it. At the moment, everything is a struggle, mentally and physically, and even getting up and dressed takes more effort for me than it should. But anyway, just checking in - I am still alive and just about kicking!